We are deep in the grief. Whether we know it or not

The Grand Canyon sized predicament we find ourselves in cannot be grasped, filled, fixed, or denied. Like its manifest monument, it can only be witnessed, wide-eyed and slack-jawed, and waded through in tiny, sometimes microscopic movements

Grief is a long game without a short cut

It is a commitment to falling apart in holy + maniacal ways 

It is a commitment to non-sense

It is also an enlisting of brave, deep faith, as the outcome is taking you more than you are deciding it
All the ways we learned to understand and manage our emotional world come to a sudden and irascible halt when grief walks through the door

Is it madness? maybe. Is it sageness? Perhaps 

Grief is not straightforward. It is an ever moving target

A tussling of emotions, responses, impulses, and imaginations happening as one. It is this smattering of dancing realities that we call grief

We try to pin it down. We try to clarify. We try to locate and to land. But it upends us every time

Sometimes the end of knowledge and the beginning of wisdom is allowing for the mystery and complexity of things. Of their loveliness and their lunacy

Holding hope with an ever tender palm as we let life whirl us into the next shape, stage, and self

Our greatest task at these times is to just. hold. on. 

Whirling with you, in love